I'm calling you out on twitter if you don't come over right now.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
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