He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking ros�, bitch!
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
Randomize
