It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
