While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Randomize
