Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
