she told me i tasted like america
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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