So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize
