I'm drive I can fine osifer
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
