Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
A few things for you to consider: 1. Drunk enough that I'm looking up the dictionary definition of Wish. 2. Dictionary.com has new features. 3. Windows is offering me 500 business cards for 5 bucks. 4. I've always wanted a card that says I'm a ninja
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
Of course I have a pirate flag
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
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