3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize
