Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Randomize
