I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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