if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
