he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
third nipple confirmed
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
