Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
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