I think I just saw someone hide a body.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
i think i just lost a toe
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
