I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
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