no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
No subtext here. People are naked.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
