What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
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