I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
The last thing I searched on my phone was "leave in conditioner on cats." This is where my life is.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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