READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
