I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
Are you telling me right now that the weed man sexted you?
THE WEED MAN SEXTED ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
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