Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
People in love make me want to vomit
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Dude. He only had one testicle. It was like his whole package was a Muppet Show character coming at me.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
