It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
