i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize