i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize