Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
While I was dancing with him in my foil dress he said, "You're like a Chipotle burrito. Don't worry, that's the best complement you could get from me."
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
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