VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
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