im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
