He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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