You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Randomize
