that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
Randomize
