check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
whose parrot is this?
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
