this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Someone left a beer in front of your door...there's a note with it that says "peace offering"
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
His nipple licking is glorious
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