I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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