So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
