i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
