Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
Randomize
