i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
if you made me into a cookie and threw me into a betty crocker easy bake oven on christmas morning...that's how baked i am
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Hey man sorry, can't talk. I'm already taking risks by ripping the bong on this conference call.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Randomize
