how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
As shirtless as possible
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
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