I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
