didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
Randomize
