3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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