Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
