everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
Randomize
