forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
