Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I'm mopping my WALLS now. And talking to my mop. I literally just told it "yeah I kno that dirt doesn't wanna come off but were gonna get aren't we?" This is some good snow!!! mini maid needs to give it to their maids. The world would be spotless!!!!
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
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