I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
