this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
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