See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
You totally narrated your dogs thoughts for 2 and a half hours last night, and I was enthralled. I didn't say one word, I just listened.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I'll get tired halfway through and end up passed out at a taco shack honestly
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
